Being aware doesn’t mean you understand.

While recently scrolling through my news feed on Facebook, I came across a post which stated, “Why didn’t this happen when we were in school, and who were the ungrateful f**** that reported it.”

The above comment was attached to a news article about a math teacher that was being charged with sexual assault. In the article, which was attached to the post, it stated that “the students all claim one time in class she gave them all repeated Bl😵w Jobs & let them take turns hitting it in different positions.”

The post had some comments underneath, all by men, with comment such as, “Lucky Bastards”, or “I would have kept that to myself.”

I get that we all have a need for sexual intimacy in our lives. It’s in our nature. It’s the way that we procreate, but I found the post incredibly disturbing.

First off, the legal age for consent is 16 in most states. If two people that are 16 years and older engage in any sexual activity, they are fully capable of giving consent. However, if someone is under the age of 18 and a figure of authority has sex with them, even if the person under the age of 18 consents, it is still illegal.

Second, the reason this post on my news feed bothered me is the pure fact that the comments made it sound as if all of the men were okay with this happening! What if these students did not consent to these act?. Even if they did, the law states that it still illegal. As a woman who is an advocate for sexual violence, I find this whole situation bothersome. There are so many survivors of both sexual and domestic violence attempting to make a change and meanwhile there are people out there who condone sexual acts between teachers and their students.

Maybe I am just being too critical or picky, but when people throw around the term rape such as “that team got raped on the field.” I might still be in the conversation, but I don’t think rape is the appropriate term to use.

About 10 years ago, I attended a frat party, during my college days. I went alone, which was entirely my own fault, but I left without barely touching a drink. I left because I overheard a conversation between two guys discussing how they wanted to see who they could get the most drunk and sleep with. Why can’t you just go up to the girl you like, court her for a bit and then get to that level? Why do you have to get her drunk?

I also get upset when fans of sports teams create signs or t-shirts that joke about a particular scandal. For example, at a Penn State game, a recent sign that some Rutger’s fans used during tailgating of a child performing a sex act on an adult. Seriously?!

Now I am not saying that all frats are like that, and just because men commented on the article that was posted on Facebook doesn’t mean that it is just men saying things like this. It’s simply about being a little more understanding and aware.

However, being aware doesn’t always mean you understand.

You can sit there and say you are aware that sexual violence is an issue in our society, in our culture. But do you know why? Do you understand why? Do you know why so many victims choose to stay silent? Because of comments and images that I just stated above.

If people had a little more decency, maybe we would be able to move more progressively to a better culture.

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